#25 DONE // Get a New Tattoo

On Friday I got a new tattoo.

I’ve wanted to get this tattoo for a very long time.

It is based off of a Bible verse that has brought me so much comfort over this past year. I don’t remember exactly when or how I found this verse, only that I found it while reading my Bible (well, obviously). But the verse reads…

“That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

- 2 Corinthians 12:10 (NIV)

This past year I have been through a lot of weakness, a lot of hardships, a lot of difficulties… The majority of said weakness, hardships, and difficulties revolve around death. Within eight months, three people who I loved very much passed away; my amazing Nana passed away in September, my beautiful friend Sam passed away in October, and my hilarious ‘brother from another mother’ Stirling passed away in April.

I think it is very safe to say this has been the hardest year of my life.

The moment I read this verse… I felt relief, I felt hope, I felt joy.

“For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Sometime we are ashamed to feel weak, we are ashamed to cry, we are ashamed to ask for help, we are ashamed to admit we are hurt.

Society has taught us that being weak is wrong, that we should never admit our weaknesses, that when we go to a job interview and the interviewer asks us what our weaknesses are that we tell them one but immediately tell them our strengths.

I’m here to tell those people to shut the hell up.

I am telling you to not listen to them.

It is perfectly okay to feel weak.

It is perfectly okay to cry, to ask for help, to admit we are hurt.

When my Nana passed away, and when Sam passed away, and when Stirling passed away… I felt so weak, so unbelievably weak. I cried for hours, missed work, locked myself up in my room, I was angry, I was confused, I was hurt, I was sad, I even threw up.

But that’s what you are supposed to do when you are mourning.

You are supposed to cry, to be angry, to be confused, to be hurt.

One of my favorite people in the world Lara Casey always says, “Tears are truth.”

Tears mean you are sad, that you are mad, that you are weak, that you are vulnerable, that you are hurting, that you are lost, that you are confused, that you need help.

Tears mean you have feelings.

Tears mean that you love.

Tears mean you are human.

“For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

So I cried and felt weak and felt sad and felt angry and felt confused and felt hurt.

While I was hurting, though, I learned so many things.

I learned that I have parents, a brother, family, and friends who love me and support me. I learned that I have people to turn to when I am hurting. I learned that I am capable of properly mourning. I learned that I could still laugh in a very sad situation. I learned that I can cry and it doesn’t mean that I am weak. I learned that I can take some time off to be by myself. I learned that I have a God who loves me so much, who holds me every time I am hurting. I learned that I can write to get my feelings out. I learned that I have to take care of my heart first before I can take care of others, because heart means everything.

I learned that I am strong.

I learned that from sad, miserable, depressing, confusing situations, that I will learn something that will make me stronger.

I learned that I am stronger that I give myself credit for.

I learned that I am strong.

“For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

I got this tattoo to remind me that I am strong, and to remind me that I will come out stronger in any hard, sad, challenging, miserable, confusing situation I come across.

So the next time someone tells you to stop being weak, tell them no.

So the next time someone tells me to stop being weak, I’ll show them my tattoo and tell them no.

Question :: Do you know that you are strong?

 

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